I'm a wife, working mom of five, and I try my best to follow Jesus. This blog is dedicated to the workings of Christ in my life. It helps to write it out.
"My grace is sufficient": Prayer Raper
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"My grace is sufficient": Prayer Raper: I'm a prayer raper. And I only know for sure that I am, because my husband coined that term one day, when I interrupted one of our conversat...
I have been reading Jonah and the whale to Harrison and Henry lately when I put them to bed. It had been one of those stories growing up that I could never believe would be real: a man inside of a whale. Right. However, as I grow in faith and understand the way that God works in us now, I realize how real that story is. God asked Jonah to go to Ninevah to preach against their iniquities. God wanted to use Jonah to change a nation. Jonah said no. To God. And on his way to Tarshish, (Harrison makes me call it "Tarsheesh") there's a huge storm. The drivers of the ship are finally persuaded by Jonah to throw him out of the boat. And it's then that the storm dies down, and Jonah ends up in the whale. Then, three days later, the whale throws him up in Ninevah. As abrasive, and quite frankly, disgusting, this story is, I am elated now to learn about this side of God's grace. 1 Thessolonians tells us: "rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circu...
The Lord has been pressing on my heart to relinquish him something that I have carefully monitored in my past two pregnancies. And it's not easy. I have lists that document the pounds that I gained in each pregnancy. It consumed me in the past; how quickly I gained weight. And no one wants to gain 10 pounds in 5 weeks like I did this pregnancy. In addition to the "all day" sickness I have felt, coupled with the fatigue, I have been consumed with how quickly have had to switch to maternity clothes with this third one. I remember also being consumed with what I weighed with the other two..and I don't want to be consumed with such a silly thing...it's been hard to enjoy my pregnancy feeling huge. And there were many times in the past pregnancies that also didn't enjoy parts because I was unhappy with how I looked. This has been pressing on my heart. I have been considering the fact that it's my last pregnancy. And that I want to enjoy it. And slowly this ...
I am not a very good parent. I want to be. This is a struggle that I never thought that I would deal with. The love that I have for my boys is indubitably the most original and stong connection that I don't have words to describe. I want to love them perfectly. I have a desire for our every engagement to be a lesson learned, or a conversation that is assorted with humor, edification, love, and inspiration that leaves my boys with development towards the Holy Spirit and an understanding of mine and God's love for them that allows them to grow into young men who do powerful things for Jesus. Unfortunately, I am a disaster. If I were to list stories about the times that I have failed to do what I aspire to be as a parent, we could possibly have a situation where not only I were a laughing stock, but that if I were God, I would consider finding a way to choose a new mother for these kids. In fact, my sin seems to be only magnified as I reflect upon my parenting skills. Thankfully, ...
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