"My grace is sufficient"

The Lord has been pressing on my heart to relinquish him something that I have carefully monitored in my past two pregnancies. And it's not easy. I have lists that document the pounds that I gained in each pregnancy. It consumed me in the past; how quickly I gained weight. And no one wants to gain 10 pounds in 5 weeks like I did this pregnancy. In addition to the "all day" sickness I have felt, coupled with the fatigue, I have been consumed with how quickly have had to switch to maternity clothes with this third one. I remember also being consumed with what I weighed with the other two..and I don't want to be consumed with such a silly thing...it's been hard to enjoy my pregnancy feeling huge. And there were many times in the past pregnancies that also didn't enjoy parts because I was unhappy with how I looked. This has been pressing on my heart. I have been considering the fact that it's my last pregnancy. And that I want to enjoy it. And slowly this ...

AH! Did you hear that sigh? Sweet relief is on the way. Yesterday and today have been two of my better days. Someone better slow me down, though, because I get waaaay too excited when I have energy-and so do these guys, who instead of having a sleeping mommy today, had a super fun mom who took them to the San Diego Safari Park after naps.  Baby Lala is making me more excited lately. I was thinking about him/her (if it's a boy, I will change the "baby lala" name:)) Harrison was outside playing after the Wild Animal Park today. I pitched him a couple of balls so that he could practice for his game on Saturday, and I kept thinking about how big he was. I was about to head inside after playing baseball with him to clean up dinner, and he asked if I would sit and watch him play. Normally, I would tell him I had to clean, but I thought I would sit an enjoy the nice weather outside. I was watching him play, thinking how often I used to sit and watch him play when he was ...

There is nothing like someone acknowledging that what you are going through is hard. It's not easy for me to explain to my husband that I literally can't stay up, and I need to sleep all day on Sunday. I'm so sick. And it's not like I have the stomach flu for two days. I have a toxic, sick feeling, and have for 5 weeks. And it will be over in three. I don't have a clue how moms make it through 9 months of pregnancy being sick. It is not easy.   This week, I was feeling like such a complainer. I spent the other morning asking for forgiveness because I feel like I am so unable to function and do well in anything right now. I'm tired and sick, and it takes everything out of me to work, let alone chase after a 2 year old and 5 year old and keep my house clean. I'm a hot mess right now. I don't even look at my shower, because it makes me want to throw up when I start to clean it. And I hardly have energy to vacuum. Side note- I am so blessed by a husba...

Jon and I have been praying and considering the idea of having a third baby since the day that I stopped breast feeding Henry. Jon was putting Henry to bed, and I told him that I needed a minute to cuddle with him, too. "What if this is my last baby?" The idea that I might be done with the "baby" stage, forever, made me sad. I honestly didn't feel like I was done. And as soon as I was blessed this year, with the opportunity to teach from home, it became a reality that a third baby would be a consideration. On March 1, I was so excited when I peed on a stick and saw the long-awaited second line. The idea that I wasn't done changing diapers, and cleaning throw up, and cuddling chubby legs was such a blessing. I knew that I wanted to enjoy every moment, and try my best to not take a thing for granted... But I'm not going to lie. I don't like being pregnant. I am not one of the few fortunate to miss out on the "morning sickness" fun. ...