Arm's distance
I notice pretty quickly, that I can start to throw a pretty awesome pitty party for myself. There is a lot of pressure in life. The week happens, and I begin to uplift my own labor. I put myself on a super high pedal stool: I work from home, watch the kids, clean the house, do the yard work, taxi Harrison around town, feed the baby, try to get a work out in, make breakfast, clean breakfast, make lunch, clean it, then dinner (by the way, Jon rocks because he takes the load off the laundry, and makes dinner most nights- this is a picture of my inner dialogue, not a clear depiction of the actual #truth...hashtag truth...)...and if Jon gets home, and he is having a bad day, I often start to desire strongly to not listen to his stress, but instead, I want so badly to compete. I have an evil, natural wanting to place my burdens on him. I'm really dramatic about it. So not only has Jon had a bad day, but I want him now to experience my stress. Even if it's not as bad as I can make it sound when I tell him about it.
And that is the danger of keeping God at an arm's distance.
It happens like wildfire. Everyday, I have a quiet time. I pray, read scripture, and end feeling ready to tackle anything; with my burdens placed on the Lord. And so swiftly, the enemy creeps in. It's my work. My laundry. My bills. My kids. My husband. As soon as everything becomes mine, I know that I am in trouble. Because when I own it, I have a certain level expectation that it will give me what I believe I am giving to it.
I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that we were all created to love and be loved. We want a perfect love. We believe we should have a perfect life. But so often, we become disappointed with the love and circumstances in our lives. I often find myself placing the burden of what a perfect love is onto people and circumstances that can't offer me what I am looking for.
When the rich man came to Jesus and asked what he could do to enter the kingdom of God, Jesus told him to sell everything and follow Him. And the message that Jesus was getting across was to say that there is nothing here. Nothing. It all will bring us an unsatisfactory taste in our mouths that might bring joy for a short while, but ultimately, will decay.
The man turned away from Jesus, disappointed. I think a lot of us do this. Whether we are unsatisfied with the answers that the Lord gives to us, or whether we are simply keeping Him at an arm's distance, we live our days expecting more.
I love to pray for two things often: God, fill me with YOUR peace. Lord, USE me. And without realizing it, I forgo the middle ground. I am like the rich man. I want God's peace without giving up My burdens. My work. My husband. My kids. My house. My day. I desire to be used by God, but I also want to let Jon know that I am a kick-ass wife and mom. And when he comes home, he shouldn't be able to put his feet up, he should help me. And a lot of times, I am left feeling self pity at the load that I carry.
As soon as I take my eyes off of Him and place them onto whatever is tangible on this Earth, I am missing the point. God says that His love is perfect. He says that He will carry our burdens. He gives us the example of imperfect men in the Bible who, once were surrendered to Him, begin to really understand what it means to know Him. And were used by Him. Their paths were directed back to become who He designed them to be. Whether they were imprisoned, being chased by kings, threatened by lions in a lion's den, being placed in a burning oven, or leading thousands of men women, and children to be saved by the splitting of a sea, they had His peace. Despite the circumstance; good or bad, the men and women who God chose to exemplify, all had one thing in common: they surrendered to Him.
He really does live up to His promises.
When I am not seeking after the Perfect love, I receive imperfect results. And it sounds so sweet and simple. But keeping God at an arm's distance, and letting the clutter of life fill what He desires to fill; what he is meant to fill, is like playing with fire. My relationships, and life circumstances begin to suffer. My language, my attitude, my relationships, my parenting...everything becomes mine. And I am not capable to do any of it.
Keeping eternity in mind throughout the day to day of life is a challenge. When I am unhappy, it's really difficult to start singing praises. However, I have noticed that as soon as I do, my burdens lighten. When I hold onto Him for dear life, instead of at an arm's distance, He is able to show me what He means in scripture about knowing Him. It's SO good. He's SO good. They become His kids, His house, His job, His Jon...and when I let go of the grip that I hold onto them, He fills me instead of what I think should fill me. And I feel way less annoyed when things don't quite go my way...because it's not my way. It's His.
16 Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”
17 “Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied. “There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.”
18 “Which ones?” he inquired.
Jesus replied, “‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, 19 honor your father and mother,’[a] and ‘love your neighbor as yourself.’[b]”
20 “All these I have kept,” the young man said. “What do I still lack?”
21 Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”
22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.
23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” Matthew 19:16-24
His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4 Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.
5 For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7 and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. 8 For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:2-8
And that is the danger of keeping God at an arm's distance.
It happens like wildfire. Everyday, I have a quiet time. I pray, read scripture, and end feeling ready to tackle anything; with my burdens placed on the Lord. And so swiftly, the enemy creeps in. It's my work. My laundry. My bills. My kids. My husband. As soon as everything becomes mine, I know that I am in trouble. Because when I own it, I have a certain level expectation that it will give me what I believe I am giving to it.
I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that we were all created to love and be loved. We want a perfect love. We believe we should have a perfect life. But so often, we become disappointed with the love and circumstances in our lives. I often find myself placing the burden of what a perfect love is onto people and circumstances that can't offer me what I am looking for.
When the rich man came to Jesus and asked what he could do to enter the kingdom of God, Jesus told him to sell everything and follow Him. And the message that Jesus was getting across was to say that there is nothing here. Nothing. It all will bring us an unsatisfactory taste in our mouths that might bring joy for a short while, but ultimately, will decay.
The man turned away from Jesus, disappointed. I think a lot of us do this. Whether we are unsatisfied with the answers that the Lord gives to us, or whether we are simply keeping Him at an arm's distance, we live our days expecting more.
I love to pray for two things often: God, fill me with YOUR peace. Lord, USE me. And without realizing it, I forgo the middle ground. I am like the rich man. I want God's peace without giving up My burdens. My work. My husband. My kids. My house. My day. I desire to be used by God, but I also want to let Jon know that I am a kick-ass wife and mom. And when he comes home, he shouldn't be able to put his feet up, he should help me. And a lot of times, I am left feeling self pity at the load that I carry.
As soon as I take my eyes off of Him and place them onto whatever is tangible on this Earth, I am missing the point. God says that His love is perfect. He says that He will carry our burdens. He gives us the example of imperfect men in the Bible who, once were surrendered to Him, begin to really understand what it means to know Him. And were used by Him. Their paths were directed back to become who He designed them to be. Whether they were imprisoned, being chased by kings, threatened by lions in a lion's den, being placed in a burning oven, or leading thousands of men women, and children to be saved by the splitting of a sea, they had His peace. Despite the circumstance; good or bad, the men and women who God chose to exemplify, all had one thing in common: they surrendered to Him.
He really does live up to His promises.
When I am not seeking after the Perfect love, I receive imperfect results. And it sounds so sweet and simple. But keeping God at an arm's distance, and letting the clutter of life fill what He desires to fill; what he is meant to fill, is like playing with fire. My relationships, and life circumstances begin to suffer. My language, my attitude, my relationships, my parenting...everything becomes mine. And I am not capable to do any of it.
Keeping eternity in mind throughout the day to day of life is a challenge. When I am unhappy, it's really difficult to start singing praises. However, I have noticed that as soon as I do, my burdens lighten. When I hold onto Him for dear life, instead of at an arm's distance, He is able to show me what He means in scripture about knowing Him. It's SO good. He's SO good. They become His kids, His house, His job, His Jon...and when I let go of the grip that I hold onto them, He fills me instead of what I think should fill me. And I feel way less annoyed when things don't quite go my way...because it's not my way. It's His.
16 Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”
17 “Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied. “There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.”
18 “Which ones?” he inquired.
Jesus replied, “‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, 19 honor your father and mother,’[a] and ‘love your neighbor as yourself.’[b]”
20 “All these I have kept,” the young man said. “What do I still lack?”
21 Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”
22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.
23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” Matthew 19:16-24
His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4 Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.
5 For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7 and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. 8 For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:2-8
Comments
Post a Comment